Despite the huge amount of awesome/badass characters on TV named Jack, there are some jackasses (pause for pun-induced laughter) who try to spoil what may be the greatest name ever. Why is this beautiful, wonderful name given to such terrible, worthless people? Either there is no God, or it's just a fairly common name. Or...both?! Anyways, here are the greatest offenders:

Puts both the "Jack" and "ass" in "jackass." He also puts the "penis" in "ass." That was a little joke of mine, because - believe it or not - this Jack is gay! I know, it's hard to believe, as he does not seem like an entirely 2-D collection of every gay stereotype ever invented at all. Oh wait. He does. He's offensive to gay people, humanity in general, and mostly people named Jack who do badass/awesome things on a daily basis.

The rumors are true, Veronica Mars was a pretty great show. Even Elliott from Just Shoot Me! was awesome on it. Then strolled in Jackie Cook, entitled bitch and toyer of Wallace's heart. She wasn't a fun bitch or anything, just a bitchy bitch who actually had the balls to make fun of Veronica by using her dead best friend's memory. This female Jack probably set back the name "Jackie" another 30 years.

3. Jack "J.D." Darius (BAYWATCH)

Ugh, any dude on Baywatch who didn't have the inherent hilariousness of David Hasselhoff was a waste of film. I watched this show for one reason: I didn't have access to internet porn and I knew there would be boobs galore. Female boobs. I really don't remember this guy, but that doesn't excuse him from being a dude on Baywatch.

4. Jack Hunter (BOY MEETS WORLD)

This Jack was introduced in the middle of the series as Shawn's rich, smarmy half-brother - otherwise, the complete opposite of Shawn. Since Shawn is awesome and Jack is his opposite, what do you end up with? Jack is the opposite of awesome...hence, an extremely lame character who took away screen time from Shawn, Cory, Topanga, Eric, and Feeny. Am I the only one who thought Feeny should have been named Jack Feeny? Probably.

5. Jack Gallo (JUST SHOOT ME!)

Poor man's Jimmy James (from Newsradio), and helped give David Spade employment for many years. Helping David Spade stay employed when not partnered up with Chris Farley is a crime for which there is no adequate punishment. I guess co-starring in a short film called My Wife Is Retarded is good enough for now.

6. Jackée (227/SISTER, SISTER)

Okay, so this happens to be the actress' name and not the name of any of her "characters." The thing is - she doesn't really have any "characters" - they just seem to be her and her shrieking, ear drum-destroying voice in different situations. Remember the annoying mom on Sister, Sister? Remember actually watching Sister, Sister? Every single episode was just about the hijinks those two got into by pretending to be the other one! What a lame show.

7. Jack Nash (THE ANDROMEDA STRAIN)

Oh boy, Will from Will & Grace plays a heroic Geraldo-esque reporter! Investigative reporting will surely stop the evil government conspiracy and the spread of this deadly disease. Oh, and act like a smarmy asshole too. Diseases hate it when you do that. Make the smarmy face! Oh, he is so channeling Geraldo. Can we get him a moustache? No? When you have an already-lame TV miniseries story about a deadly virus, the last thing you want to see is a pointless subplot about a valiant reporter telling you things that you already know. This Jack deserves to be jacked in the face...with a virus!

8. Jack Thompson (FOX NEWS)

One of the worst Jacks EVER. I can't even begin to list the offenses this Jack has committed and how great of an assbag he is. He's convinced video games lead to non-stop rioting and violence, that listening to Howard Stern is akin to raping an entire orphanage, and that the First Amendment was a pretty bad idea. I guess he has a point - whenever I play Mario 3 I glue a raccoon tail to my butt and start kicking turtle shells at moving cacti. If this Jack had his way, we wouldn't even be able to watch Jack Bauer do whatever needs to be done. He's a traitor to his own name.

9. Jack Berger (SEX AND THE CITY)

Okay, confession time: I've seen all of Sex and the City. And when Jack Berger came around, he seemed like he would be a pretty cool dude for Kentucky Derby-winner Carrie Bradshaw to date. He was funny, self-deprecating, and interesting. Then he split - from TOTALLY out of nowhere - after becoming insanely neurotic and broke up via Post-It note - which is actually kinda funny I guess. But he teased us with a potentially cool character and then slapped us across the face.

10. Jack Osbourne (THE OSBOURNES)

Ugh, everything on this show that wasn't Ozzy incoherently mumbling at the remote control was awful. This Jack wasn't as bad as his sister, but he was still pretty awkward and annoying. And that may be one of the ugliest 'fros ever.