Heaven's Suggestion Box

Cory Matthews Travels Abroad For a Semester

Cory: Ahhh, a semester in Germany. This is gonna be so awe-Mr. Feeny: Guten tag, Mr. Matthews.Cory: Mr. Feeny? Oh God, it can't be.Mr. Feeny: Ja, Mr. Matthews. You need to practice your German, lest you appear to be an "ugly American." Then again,...

Television's Lamest Jacks

Despite the huge amount of awesome/badass characters on TV named Jack, there are some jackasses (pause for pun-induced laughter) who try to spoil what may be the greatest name ever. Why is this beautiful, wonderful name given to such terrible,...

The Unluckiest Man in the World Joins Match.com

Jim Peterson's Right Hand Gets In A Pickle

What the hell? Oh God no. Am I stuck? OH GOD NO! Jim? JIM?! Wake up, buddy! Wake up, you son of a bitch! What did you do?! Would you let me know why there is a fat girl smothering your right arm? Why are you and I being separated by Mama Cass?!...

7 Sites Redone, If Girls Ruled the Internet Instead of Boys

Jason Michaels is the Virgin Mobile Summer Intern. You can read his blog here. If you have any "Websites if Girls Ruled the Internet" send them to me at jasonsinternship@gmail.com and I'll post them next week!

CH Sports Weekly: Tell Us How Our Asses Taste!

Ethan: Let's say you're John Paxson. Are you taking Rose or Beasley? Or are you going to skip the draft altogether and just brag about the shot you hit to ice the 93 Finals?Amir: I'm no longer going to bother learning names for these top five...

Clippy Helps Write a Love Letter

Jason is the Virgin Mobile summer intern. Read his blog here.

RIP George Carlin

George Carlin died of heart failure yesterday at 71.  Nothing we can say here will do more to highlight Carlin's massive contribution to comedy than showing one of his classic bits. Please enjoy his 'Seven Dirty Words' routine and realize...